“Memory, after all, is the surest form of immorality.”

Journey to the West

We are in an important season of memories. What are your childhood memories of this time of year? I don’t remember that many momentous gifts as a child. I do remember receiving a train set, which was a complete surprise. It was fun to play with for years, particularly when friends came over. Deciding where to put the signals, splits, buildings and other features was probably as much fun as watching the train run.

My memories that linger are those related to the feelings and sensations associated with those I loved. I particularly remember being with my grandparents in Alabama. My grandmother was a Fourth Grade Teacher and loved decorating extensively. I have no idea where she kept all of her decorations, but their home was a wonderland! Arriving at their house was like driving into a Thomas Kinkade painting. Once inside, the smells of the fireplace, the treats cooking in the kitchen, and the candles made you feel cozy. Most importantly, we knew we were with people we loved and who loved us.

“People do not die for us immediately, but remain bathed in a sort of aura of life which bears no relation to true immortality but through which they continue to occupy our thoughts in the same way as when they were alive. It is as though they were traveling abroad.”

Marcel Proust

Although my parents and grandparents are now deceased, my memories of them live on. While my memories of them extend beyond this time of year, those are the clearest. Reliving those memories keeps their love and influence alive in my heart.

What are your greatest memories as an adult? Certainly, there are key events of life and death that are momentous and unforgettable. Yet again, this time of year – year after year – plays an important role in memories. When it comes to your loved ones, what do you hope they remember about this season? It’s not an event or unique “experience.” It’s a season of tradition, of giving and receiving, heightened senses, and, most importantly, a demonstration of love and values.

“One lives in the hope of becoming a memory.”

Antonio Porchia

What are the memories you hope your friends and loved ones take from and remember about this weekend? In the scurrying about in preparation, recognize that it may not be the gifts and other trappings that they remember. It may be the private conversations, the hugs, the time they spend with you that they remember long after you’re no longer alive. It’s the memories that last. The greatest gifts you may give this year are the wonderful memories you inspire.

May this Holiday Season bring great memories to you and those you love!

Rick Adkins, CFP®, ChFC, MBA

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